Saturday, May 10, 2014

"Did you just use a tortilla as a napkin?"

In today's issue of Marie Claire Elizabeth, we have an exclusive interview with fashion icon Marie herself. Read on for a sneak peek of the transcript:

Q: Marie, how do you keep your luscious locks so luxuriously soft?

A: I undertake a strict regimen to keep my hair feeling baby soft. At least three times a week, but preferably more, I apply a mask of only the finest regurgitated milk to my hair. Next, someone rubs my hair with a soft, dry cloth to really work the nutrients from the milk into my scalp. At this point, the mask begins to set and get a bit crusty, so my assistant finger combs my hair for that carefree tousled look. Finally, twice a week a handsome man pampers me by washing my hair with Johnson & Johnson Baby Shampoo.

Q: Which fashion trend do you think will really take off this year?

A: For some unforeseen reason, my mother insists on placing a bib around my neck at all hours every day. A bib! The shame of it all. I try to put a positive spin on it, so to speak, by manipulating the bib around my neck to turn it into a superhero cape. I don't care what Edna Mode says; capes are going to be all the rage this spring.

Q: Every celebrity commits a fashion faux pas every once in a while. Tell us: what's yours?

A: Two words: highwater pants. My mom also tried squeezing me into a pair of pseudo-jeggings, but thankfully she couldn't pull them over my scrumptious thighs, so I escaped that catastrophe.

For a copy of the full interview, subscribe to Marie Claire Elizabeth by sending in your mail order with $19.99 enclosed.


No comments:

Post a Comment