"I have a problem," he said.
"Yes?" I responded.
He gestured to his shoe. The laces were untied. "I don't know how to tie my shoes."
Uh . . . come again?
Turns out he's always worn shoes with Velcro straps because he never learned to tie his shoes. I attempted to talk him through the steps to tie his own shoe the first two times his laces were untied. The third time, I gave up and tied them myself.
Pretty sure one of the reasons I decided to teach fourth grade is precisely so I wouldn't have to tie shoes. Alas.
* * *
One particularly resourceful student went straight to the dictionary and started looking up words. Good for him, right?
Until the first two words he read aloud were "prostate" and "prostitute."
I couldn't turn the page fast enough. "How about protractor?" I suggested. "We have those in our classroom!" Not to mention they're a little less likely to bring about phone calls from angry parents.