"Girl, you can have a Coke."

Tonight I tried to take multi-tasking to a whole new level: plucking my eyebrows while brushing my teeth.

It was tricky, but I had moderate (read: mild) success!

You all should try it sometime. It's rather . . . exhilarating.

"Eat up, little one. You need your strength." -- Jessica

Jennifer: "I don't know why I'm so hungry all of the time."
Cari: "Maybe you're going through a growth spurt."
Jennifer: "Where? Out? "
Cari: "Maybe you're getting a butt!"

"We're not really BFFs, you know? We're just Fs."

It's no secret that I somehow manage to give myself second degree burns almost every time I use the oven. I wasn't always this way, but things have gone downhill since living in an apartment.

Yesterday, Heather gave me an oven mitt as a "Happy January!" gift. And she made me find her a bag and tissue paper to wrap it in before she gave it to me. But I didn't have any tissue paper, so I gave her some stylish floral napkins instead.

It was a good time.

"It's like drinking a spice cabinet."

Current Music: That Thing You Do! -- The Wonders

I propose that everyone start incorporating the word “frate” into their vocabularies. Starting now.

Freight? you may be asking. As in, a type of train?

No. Frate. As in “friend date.” As in “social event between a guy and a girl that would generally be categorized as a 'date,' except for the fact that both parties involved know that their feelings for each other are mutually platonic.”

It could clear up so much confusion.

Scenario 1:

Strapping Young Man decides that he wants to take Noble Lady to the company Christmas party, as everyone is expected to have a date, and if a man even thinks about showing up solo, he'll be the laughingstock of the office for the next year.

Strapping Young Man: “Noble Lady, would you like to accompany me to the company Christmas party so I don't become the butt of all the jokes for the next twelve months?”
Noble Lady: “It would be a privilege to join you! But before we discuss the particulars, I must inquire as to your intentions. Is this a date or is it a frate?”
SYM: “Definitely a frate.”
NL: “Excellent. I will take care to abstain from overanalyzing your every move at the party, then.”
SYM: “That would be most appreciated. I'll pick you up at 7:00.”

Scenario 2:

Blushing Young Woman returns home from an evening spent in the company of Loyal, Strong and True Cougar Fan Man, whom she thought she could have been interested in at one time, though it was too soon to tell.

Roommates: “Blushing Young Woman! How was the date?”
Blushing Young Woman: “Well, it was fun, but it felt more like a frate to me.”
Roommates: “Too bad. Let us peruse the ward selectory for future targets.”

And so forth. If "frate" became common enough, Virtuous Maidens with Hookups to Free Tickets to Events in the Harris Fine Arts Center Because of Her Job just might be able to invite her male friends to join her without sending mixed signals.

So spread the word.

"He sounds short." -- Nina

I think I have fibers of dental floss stuck in my teeth.

Oh, the irony . . .

Happy birthday, Heather!

Highlight of the day: Presenting Heather with a birthday card that read something like this:

(on the front): I wanted to get you For A Special Guy on Your Birthday

(inside): May your every wish be already on the way! Happy Birthday. Dinner will have to wait. He's coming at 5:40. Love, Jennifer. P.S.  I suggest you wear jeans.

Few times have I heard her scream so shrilly.

She's out on a motorcycle ride right now.

Sister of the Year Award? Why, thank you. I accept. :)

"Just smile into the carpet!"

I don't know what you're talking about. I definitely did not run a Starburst through the dryer, and I certainly didn't contemplate tasting the melted morsel for .04 seconds before tossing it in the trash.

Erm, I mean, ::shifts eyes::, what Starburst?